Apologies

That last post had to be the. lamest. ever. in the history of blogging. For that, I apologize for making you nod off at your desk (what, you don't read blogs at work, too?)....

I promise to have a much better post next time. Serves me right for trying to post at work on a Monday morning when I have twenty different things due and no motivation!

Here's a picture of C from vacation in January to tide you over.

Lunch

So I might have mentioned that C likes to get up early, and has gotten in the habit of asking me to take her to pre-school in the mornings (it's exciting to be out while it's still "good night time"). Yesterday, she woke up early (even though on the weekend I do make a point of telling her we don't have to rush anywhere and can rot in bed a little) and went downstairs. All was quiet for a bit (it's never good when you can't hear them - they're up to something), so I got up and went to see what she was doing. She had packed her lunch to bring today.



Yes, that. Plus two Go-Gurt yogurts (one for her and one, allegedly for her friend L). I didn't say anything, just left it in the fridge (she had packed it in a bag, too). I secretly replaced the Lunchables with some macaroni and cheese and some green beans.

This morning, as we're scrambling to get out the door - she gets her lunch and tells me she doesn't want the mac n cheese or green beans, but what she packed originally.
My child's lunch today will be a lunchable, some yogurt and a Rice Krispie treat.

Tip o'the week

If you have a swing set in your yard, remove the swings before winter. I made the mistake of leaving them on, and today C was set on swinging. Now, most of the winter it's been warm (warm being relative of course) but today? Today the temp was in the teens with a wind chill probably hovering near zero or below.

But the sun was shining, and I was planning on grilling some lamb chops for dinner (yes, I am one of those weirdos who use the grill year round. Won't D be surprised when he goes to grill something in the spring and we already need a new tank of gas?) and chicken for dinner tomorrow night....so I told C we could go outside for a bit.

When did the cold start bothering me? I remember being a kid, and the greatest thing was being allowed outside after dark to slide in the back yard. And then as a teenager, I'd go ice skating all the time. Outside. The guys would all play hockey, and the girls (all 3 of us) would pretend to be Olympic ice skaters (pretty sad since I can't even skate backwards). I know in college (in VT, where it's winter all year round!) the alcohol acted as anti-freeze, but even during the day when I'd walk down the hill to the mall, I'd still be outside walking. Now, it's car to garage to train station (ok, that does get cold) to work and back again.

Oh well, calendar says spring soon. And among all the Easter/Passover stuff in the stores, there are signs of spring. Plus the commercials are changing from cold/flu medicine to allergy medecine.

Car Wars

So I may have mentioned that my current vehicle has approximately 169,000 miles on it (fast approaching 170,000). While the car is still in great shape (if you can ignore the debris a 4 year old creates in the back seat), I realize that his time is nearly up (what? your cars aren't assigned a name and sex when you purchase them?) as Hans is a 2000 VW Passat. He was D's first brand new car, and when we moved to T-town, we switched cars as I had a leased Jetta at the time (her name was Liesl).

I'm thinking he'll last through the summer, and hopefully most of next winter, so that by the time bonus and taxes roll around there'll be some $$ for a down payment. (Let's not discuss the potential impact AMT may have. La la la I can't hear you). I'm a planner though, so that means I've been checking out websites and comparing potential new vehicles already.

The part of me that still thinks I'm in college, and cool and all is yelling "A convertible! A sexy convertible in black!" Similar to the one up in the corner there (I'm very proud of myself for figuring out the import image option, btw!)...however, and of course there's a however, the practical side of me has a retort to all of that.

"Of course it's sexy and sporty. The person driving that car has a life! They can afford $60,000 automobiles and don't have to worry about gas mileage and crash test results and air bags. They won't have a 4 year old in the back seat asking for fruit snacks and a drink and spilling everything. They won't need to fit aforementioned 4 year old's friends in the car either. Besides, how cool is that car gonna be with a booster seat in the back anyway? "

Sigh. Back to looking at cars that get 30 mpg on the highway and have good side impact crash results.

Keeping Kosher

C got up early today (early as in, I was getting ready to go downstairs to finish getting ready to leave) and decided she wanted me to drive her to work. Of course, she doesn't announce this intention until I'm ready to walk out the door and bending down to give her one last kiss.

So, she hurries up, gets dressed, and tells me she wants to take her Cheerios in a bag for breakfast. As I'm waiting for her to finish dressing, I put the Cheerios in a bag, and thinking it looked a little lacking, added some fruit snacks and colored Goldfish. Her oj is probably still sitting on the table, waiting until we get home tonight to be thrown out.

We're on the highway (less stop lights that way!) and she's telling me she likes being in my car when it's almost "good morning time" (it's not quite light out at 6:30 am), and it's like being on an adventure. She then informs me that she's hungry. I point out that she has a bag of Cheerios. Apparently, she doesn't like the Goldfish mixed with the Cheerios. Working in NYC for almost 5 years, I knew about the not mixing meat and dairy. The not mixing Cheerios and goldfish? Did not know that. (BTW we're Catholic).

She's never been that picky before. Oh sure, she goes through her phases where she'll want bunnies n cheese every night, or ravioli for both lunch and dinner, but she's never had a problem with food touching or being together....I hope this isn't the start of something new, and she's just going to be a health nut - where Cheerios are all natural and colored Goldfish just aren't.

President's Day

So today is a day off, in honor of our presidents Washington and Lincoln. Thank you gentlemen. I took the opportunity to have the oil changed in the car (the service techs always make a comment about the mileage. Like they've never seen a car with 169,000 miles on it before?), get some of the crustiness washed off the car (those touchless car washes aren't the greatest, but they get most of the yuck off) and some retail therapy at the mall and my favorite large box store - Target.

I have been in a cleaning frenzy lately, probably due to all the energy I'm creating with all the emotion (on my part at least). So, nice clean house too. Clean as in, kill the germs clean, not just pick up the clutter. And why do all these odd thoughts pop into my head as I'm cleaning? For instance, I'm mopping the bathroom floor, and thinking maybe it would neat to be a CSI tech type person. But then I think of all the science classes I'd have to take to do that, and that was the end of that idea. And, how do three people make all this dust? When, we're hardly ever home during the week. It doesn't make sense.

I took C to see Beauty and the Beast yesterday afternoon. She loved it, but the Belle at Daddy's work is not the real Belle. The real Belle is on the Disney ship. And she can't wait to see the real Belle, and Pink Princess and Cinderella again. (She's got a little under 11 months to wait - luckily there's some fun stuff in the meantime to keep the time moving.)

You say it's your birthday

Today is John J.'s (not his real name) birthday. I had the hugest crush on him in college. He was dark Irish (with the dark hair and blue blue eyes) and had a smokin' bod. He played rugby, and was one of the "twenty minutes outside of Bahstahn" crowd. When I started college, he was a year ahead of me. As I definitely packed on the "freshman fifteen", I had no chance.

But then he lived in a dorm where a lot of my guy friends ended up. And I spent a summer sweating at the Y, picturing myself showing up in that dorm wearing cute shorts and a cuter top, and him finally noticing. I did reach my goal of losing weight that summer, but as for him noticing me? Hah. He was more interested in the very slender, very unattainable blonde goddess (who was actually really really nice!) from Joisey. John J and I ended up as acquaintences instead, that year.

The following year, he had some issues and left school midway through the year. I entered a horrible relationship with someone who knew all the things to say. When that relationship ended (and badly) I was on the "depression diet". It's amazing what you think is a crisis when you're 20. Anyway, I sent him a card for his birthday that year - just a kind of, hey, thinking of you.

That next year, I was in the best shape of my entire life. I had spent the summer running, swimming and biking (kind of mini-triathalons!) and working two jobs. I had a smokin' bod. John J was back at school and would graduate with my class. For Halloween I went as a scuba diver (I had one of those wet suit looking bathing suits and wore my running tights underneath)...usually I just went out as drunk college student. I don't remember the exact details, but he followed me home that night! Nothing happened other than some kissing, as we were both pass out drunk. I swore I would remember ever detail of those kisses.

And isn't it funny? I don't remember a single detail about them now.

But wherevah you are John J? Happy Birthday.

Another Saturday Night

So, I spent part of this past week on the Island of Long. Business trip...to review files. Not very exciting. But it was 2 nights of being responsible for just myself, which is nice to experience every so often (in my case, every quarter). And I get a whole king size bed to myself!! No one kicking me because their little feet are cold, and hogging the pillow. We don't generally co-sleep, but if C gets up in the middle of the night and wanders in, she can stay. (It's easier, and means more sleep than struggling to get her back to sleep in her own bed. And when she says "It's lonely sleeping by myself" - how can you argue with that?)

Also, D is the warmer partner in this arrangement. He's always hot...even in the middle of winter it's very rare that he wears a sweater. Moi? I'm bundled up and still cold. I lost the flannel sheet arguement (D arguing that he would melt if we had flannel sheets on the bed)...but we have a cotton blanket, an electric blanket (Bliss!) and a down comforter. The electric blanket is a dual control, so D never uses his, and I pre-heat my side every night. I love it. No more waiting for my feet to warm up so I can fall asleep.

Blizzard tomorrow. And of course, the idiot who runs the theatre that D works at will not cancel any of the shows scheduled. He doesn't want to give the money back. So D will spend the night (seeing as there are two shows tonight too) and all day tomorrow. I find it incredibly frustrating. If he would take some comp time during the week to get some things done around the house I might be more amenable to some of these crazy hours, but he doesn't. There's always some excuse.

Intentions

Really, I need to do something about my weight. It's embarrassing. I have never been this heavy in my entire life. And yes, D is correct in his assessment that my attitude is "all or nothing"...I don't think he understands that in my pre-mommy days, I loved to work out. I was all about getting sweaty, and achy muscles, and the feeling I would have after a good workout. I used to run too, believe it or not. I even had a 40 degree rule - as long as the temp was 40 or above I would go running. Sigh. Those days are gone.

So this morning, I set the alarm clock extra early. My mom gave me a treadmill for Christmas the year C was born ....it's moved with us twice already. And it's sitting downstairs waiting to be used. 20 minutes is better than nothing, right? Except that when the alarm went off, I was in that nice snuggly warm spot in bed, that feels better than anything....and after hitting the snooze button a couple times, I finally changed the alarm to my regular wake up time.

In my head, I think 20 minutes a day would help. But it's not the same. I want to be back to that 20 something, no pain, no gain (in college, I even went running with a barely recovered sprained ankle). How did this happen, that I have no free time, that joints ache that I never gave a thought to before? (Yes I know. C. And I wouldn't trade her for all the good workouts in the world. And I know before I realize it, she'll be off to school, making friends and having sleepovers and I'll have more free time. It'd just be nice to have time a couple times a week to try to recapture some of that "old" me...).

I just need a good kick in the behind to get me going now....with the 20 minutes here and there, so when I do have that free time (there will be free time, right??) I don't have Richard Simmons crying next to my bed.

Opportunities

So, I recently had a chance to discuss a new opportunity, thanks to someone I worked with once who recommended me to his current employers. That's what I was doing Wed morning, before the call to pick up C from pre-school.

I printed out the directions from MapQuest, and left plenty of time for getting lost (which I tend to do) and traffic. Even with the few wrong turns I managed to take, I was a half hour early. I hung out listening to the local news until it was time to go in. The people were very nice, and seemed to all get along. It's a very small office (as it's just starting up) in a nice location.

However, and there is a however, the work they had in mind is something that would not be interesting (to me). And, I realize that the salary I currently make is out of the Hartford area ballpark, but what was discussed was a significant cut. Which also means a title cut.

The person I interviewed with also made a comment about how he felt sorry for me, having to commute such a long distance with a small child at home. Now, intellectually I understand he was trying to be empathetic, but why isn't anyone making these sorts of comments to any guy who might be interviewing for a position? (That's a completely rhetorical question, since for all I know, those comments might be getting made. But somehow I doubt it).

I've agonized over this decision. Not that any offer has been made yet, but the people sounded pretty positive that it would be forthcoming. The pro's were pretty compelling - a shorter commute, less travel, less responsibility and a chance to make a difference at a company just starting out. But the con's were too much to overcome - less salary, less repsonsbility, and the fact that I'd be even more of a grunt worker.

As I'm not in a position where I have to make a move, I think I'll keep rolling the dice. Someone, somewhere will come up with a position that's right for me, in terms of salary, and time off and all those "quality of life" issues.

Burning the vacation days

I scheduled another vacation day today. Why? Well, there were a couple reasons....kindergarten pre-registration (ie. Open house at the school) is tonight from 5-8 (yes, I know I could have left work early) and I had a chance to discuss another opportunity with some nice folks. So I thought, why not? It doesn't hurt to discuss opportunities, and sometimes the right one comes along.

So, to sum up, opportunity discussion in the morning, followed by a free late morning/afternoon for me! then open house. But, as with the best laid plans of mice and men, it went awry. Being the weenie that I am, I checked messages after I left the nice folks. No messages. I needed a restroom break, and happily stopped at Borders (I love to read). So I spent some time browsing the aisles of books, trying to remember which authors I like to read (for some reason the minute I walk into the bookstore all their names escape me) and which authors look like they have some potential. After leaving the bookstore, I check messages again. And, a message from C's pre-school. They want me to call them. Why they can't call D, who works 10 minutes away, is beyond me. No, they call down to Stamford. Anyway, I call D, ask him to call them back and find out what the situation is, and call me back. So he does, and their verdict? Pink eye.

So, discussion opportunity, followed by picking up C and trying to get ahold of her pediatrician. Now I'm just waiting 'til the right moment to tell her she has to turn off Dora or Diego so we can get the prescription. I don't even want to think about wrestling eye drops into her.

And the opportunity? I am conflicted. More on that later.